Baby’s First Lesson February 28, 2012
Well yesterday I went to visit the adorable, beautiful, angelical “god”-child of mine. I tossed her round the sofa, got her in hysterical laughter by saying “har-har-har” like i’m off ANTM or summink, tried to teach her french “les yeux!” *jabs baby in eye* and we joined in baby yoga on Waybuloo (is that how you spell it?)
This got me and her daddy deep in a debate about kids TV. What the FEK is up with Kids TV today? Waybuloo was BIZARRE, and “In the Night Garden” led to the inuendo “Ninky Nonk In The Night Garden”, what happened to the GOOD shows! Well (yes, it’s ANOTHER list, get some better inspiration Bibs) *takes DEEP breath*….
TV shows of my YOUTH!:
Playbox
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H5jfaBg3T-Q
Sooty and Sweep
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_-GoAau3wo
Thomas The Tank Engine
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gt2qtlrXWp0
Rainbow
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M62SnbNizIM
Fireman Sam
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vU8UftMfEak
Pocket Dragon Adventures
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TfQRGK4s3W8
The Racoons
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FXsjzcC4Jdw
Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gn5iCn_T68c
Spiderman
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4o29VoxtsFk
Postman Pat
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4o29VoxtsFk
Noahs Island
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0QJ2kGs1UpM
The Animals of Farthing Wood
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_MaFL84DwqM
The adult shows I used to watch are even BETTER. I’ll save those for another day ;p
Mush Disclaimer!!!! February 13, 2012
Valentine’s day is round the corner again. I don’t have any particular feelings for or against this holiday. I’m not particularly down with mushy romance and I don’t really like romantic movies. However, there’s a handful of exceptions!
I give you, my top 10 MUSHY MOVIES! (In no particular order)
13 Going on 30
I <3 Mark “Ruffles” Ruffalo!
40 Year Old Virgin
Looks dumb, actually GENIUS. Also, has Paul Rudd in it, need I say more! <3
Juno
Beyond ADORABLE and with great music. I was a *little* bit in love with Michael Cera after seeing this.
Clueless
There is ACTUALLY no limit to how many times I can watch this movie, and I know most of the script off by heart. And Paul Rudd features again ;p
10 Things I Hate About You
No. Commnent. Needed.
Beauty and the Beast
I still want THAT dress. And the hair…and the library…and the singing staff…
The Little Mermaid
Prince Eric. End Of.
Notting Hill
“You daft PRICK”
Wall-e
I feel emotional just LOOKING at that picture. My parents played a game called “guess which parts Tasha cried at” while watching this. Bastards.
Tangled
Still. Not. Over. It.
Friendship Cocktail January 6, 2012
New years day, around 9am, after I kicked him in the balls for tickling me everytime I was nodding off, Liam had a stroke of drunken lunacy genius.
I don’t recall what lead to this but he invented the cocktail called a “Tasha Bibby“. To make a “Tasha Bibby” you mix the following:
Cherry Cola
Dark Pirate Rum
“Frank Turner” Whiskey (Whiskey thats been smoked by the fire of flaming guitars)
Gold eddible glitter
The Label: Cinderella glugging from a bottle, with Snow White passed out on the floor while the seven dwarfs poke her boobs.
Well, this is just the beginning! *evil cackle* with the aid of Master Leigh BEHOLD in no particular order, the complete works of the Friendship Cocktail:
“James Leigh“
Ginger Ale
Southern Comfort
Glenfidditch
Cherry (stuff what Master Leigh knows what it is)
The Label: A monkey immitatin a budda
“JO’T“
Dr Pepper
Wild Turkey
Tabasco
The Label: He universe arrnged so it also looks like an atom
“April Massey“
Archers
Malibu
Pineapple
Grenadine
The Label: Two jugs (cup not breasticle)
“Sam Burton“
Baileys
Tia Maria
Espresso Shot
Chocolate sprinkles
The Label: A brownie badge stating “alcoholic”
“Heather Gordon“
Bombay Sapphire
Sloe Gin
Slimline tonic
Cranberry
The Label: A ginger cat in a flat cap smoking a pipe
“Sally Moore“
A dirty dry Martini
Vodka frozen cubes
salty green olives
Rose Vermouth/Martini Roso
The Label: A gothic hat and quill
“Serena Wright“
Desperado
Red Bull
Amaretto
Lime
with a Port and Jaeger shot in the centre
The Label: Scales of Justice
“Lynda Berry“
Vegan White Russian
Side of Prawn Crackers
The Label: A wilting rose
“Jasmin Dawes“
Pussy Energy Drink
Crabbies
Vodka
Plastic Plane floating in it
The Label: The slide shute emergency exit sign of a plane cabin
“Courtney Appleton“
Koppaberg
Pimms
Cucumber and Mint
The Label: Zombie Wizard of Oz characters walking down the yellow brick road
“Igor“
Baileys
Espresso
Caramel
Kahlua
The Label: Orange Panda leading an orchestra
“Emma Parsons“
Cranberry
Orange
Archers
Vodka
Magic Wand submerged in the mix
The Label: Sleeping Beauty taking 40 winks over a large book
“Amy Shuker“
Archers
Vodka
Orange Juice
Grenadine
Flower Fairy hanging off the edge of the glass
The Label: The forest from Midsomer Nights Dream
I thoroughly intend to try and make every one of these and taste test them!…maybe over a few months though or I’ll speand the rest of the year in a booze coma.
“Lucky” Old Hume January 5, 2012
There he is, old Mr Hume.
So I get to work this morning, still in a sleepy haze (pre caffiene!) and I get accosted by the chief. “The Christmas Tree HAS to be taken down today” he says. To which I enquire “is that because it is ‘bad luck’. It’s not real you know?”.
Nevermind the four tapes of notes I have to type, with more on thier way, the endless amounts of admin or the big pile of files on my desk with work to do on them. No, taking down the tree is top of the list, or the office will be CURSED. This was not the best time of the morning to start a discussion about superstitions with me, and as such, I argued. We’re not going to be smited if the tree stays up past 6th December. To which the respone is “well the business will fail and we’ll all be out of a job!”. Yes, mature Christmas trees do bring despair and devestation wherever they lay too long…No-one was backing down in this argument, but it reminded me of a fellow I met in Edinburgh, David Hume.
There he is again. He’s clever, opinionated, he doesn’t do religion, and most particularly, is highly against superstitions. He would be most angry to know that people consider it to be “good luck” to rub his big toe. See how shiny it is?
I think Hume got the right idea.
I walk under ladders, I cross people on stairs, I put shoes on the table, I open umbrellas indoors, I leave Christmas decorations up too long, I cross the cutlery in the wasing up bowl, I spill salt, I’ve seen solitary magpies AND broken multiple mirrors, and Im alright.
Collins Dictionary defines superstitions as “irrational beliefs”. I simply say, it’s BS.
2012 – The year of no BS! January 4, 2012
That is right, I declare 2012 will be EXCELLENT! Firstly although I am not making any official “resolutions”, I do feel I should make more effort with my “blog” but sadly there is a reason my self-blog-spression has been a little lax since joining WordPress. Partly, not having broadband, and my laptop being balls. Secondly, having so much to do. In a reflection of 2011 as a whole, I give you, my 2011:
- Completing Anxiety group.
- Mum and Dad moving to Stubbington.
- Going to Brighton and getting smashed in many gay bars and dancing to Britney spears.
- Going to Bristol and walking the length of the town in search of bridges, foliage and Banksy.
- Going to Gloucester and running round the Harry Potter Corridors in the Cathedral and raiding the Beatrix Potter shop.
- Visiting Grandma in Bath.
- Going to the RI to see Doc O’Brien talk about radiowaves and sleeping in “the Dinge”.
- Going to the RI to see Harry Kroto talk about C60 and meeting the adorable “Paddy” at Keystone Hostel.
- Going to Skeptics and seeing Simon Singh and Amateur Transplants.
- Going to Skeptics and meeting Jim Al Kalili.
- Going to Amazingstoke to see Uncages Monkeys.
- Going to the Southbank Centre to see Brian Cox and Jeff Foreshaw talk about the Quantuim Universe.
- Stalking Brian and Jeff at Picadilly Waterstones and making a tit of myself with the “tap joke”.
- Going to Portsmouth Uni to pretend I’m a student and have Carlos Frenk tell us about Dark Matter and Dark Energy.
- Riding the bikes from Portsmouth the Cowes.
- Riding the bikes round Hayling Island.
- Riding the bike over to Southwick.
- Going on a self guided Harry Potter tour of London.
- Going to Winter Wonderland in Hyde Park.
- Dressing up as CHAPS on a Camden Pub Crawl.
- Camping in Nutbourne when Annie got naked.
- Seeing Tangled.
- Seeing harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2.
- Seeing Bearking Dawn Part 1.
- Going to DISNEYLAND and PARIS.
- My goddaughter being born.
- Emma and Dan getting engaged.
- Going to Reading on the Saturday and seeing Pulp and The Kills.
- Going to Reading on the Sunday and being blown away by Muse and Elbow and sleeping over in the swanky hotel.
- Eurovision night.
- Swinging in the Woods.
- Seeing Frank Turner solo.
- Seeing Eliza Doolittle (for free).
- Seeing Panic at The Disco.
- Seeing Scroobuis Pip.
- Seeing Ben Folds (LEGEND).
- And lastly, seeing Chu in A Midsomer Night’s Dream.
- Seeing in 2012 with my first taste of champagne while whatching the fireworks going off on the South Bank.
Now that looks like quite a lot but i think 2012, you and me can do better than that!
Platform Entertainment January 2, 2012
Guess who is interogating who?
Girl: “What’s that?”
PC: “It’s pepper spray”
Girl: “What’s it for?”
PC: *explains*
Girl: “…Do you fight pirates?”
This totally just made my day.
